The Last-Minute Legally Blonde Costume

Four pieces and your own jeans

This is the costume for the person who forgot Halloween was Saturday. I have been that person. The hot pink sweater, the pens, the dog, the carrier and the scrunchie do all the talking. The jeans just hold your legs in.

The sweater is an oversized knit, so it is meant to hang loose and slouch a little at the shoulders. Check the size chart on the listing before you order. If you are between sizes, stay with your normal size, since oversized already has the room built in.

Tuck the very front of the sweater into your jeans if you want some shape. Leave it out if there is a buffet. Nobody at the party is going to grade your tuck, but it does look a little more put together in pictures, and you will be in a lot of pictures once people figure out who you are.

The dog does most of the work

The lifelike plush chihuahua is the piece that gets the first laugh. It reads instantly from across a room. A carrier with a tiny face peeking out is funnier than half the actual costumes I saw last year.

Carry it by the handles for photos. Your arm will get tired faster than you think, because you will be holding a drink in the other hand all night.

Practical tip from someone who learned it the hard way. Do not leave the dog on a chair. Someone will sit on it, or pick it up and wander off for photos with it, and you will spend twenty minutes hunting for a stuffed chihuahua in a stranger's kitchen. Keep it in the carrier and keep the carrier on you.

Pens, scrunchie and a ponytail

The fluffy pom pom pens come as a three pack. Use the pink one for the costume, obviously, and hand the other two to friends who showed up with nothing. They are also very good for writing someone's number on a napkin like it is a legal document.

The hot pink jumbo velvet scrunchie goes around a ponytail. A high ponytail is more dramatic if your hair is long enough. Curl the ends with a big barrel iron if you have ten minutes. Skip it if you do not.

For makeup, pink lips and a little blush is plenty. Paint your nails a soft pink the night before if you can, because you will be holding that pen up next to your face in every picture. If not, skip them. Nobody is checking.

Comfortable enough to sit on the steps

Comfort is the best part of this one. You can sit on porch steps, like I did, or on a curb waiting for your ride, or on somebody's kitchen floor at midnight. Flat shoes or sneakers are completely fine. White sneakers look right with light wash jeans, and your feet will thank you around eleven, when everyone in heels starts carrying their shoes.

If the weather turns cold, you are already wearing a sweater, so you win. If it is warm, push the sleeves up to your elbows. You do not need any other props, although a notebook to scribble in does sell the bit.

When Halloween is over, the sweater goes straight into your fall rotation with jeans and boots. The scrunchie goes in the bathroom drawer and the pens go in your desk cup. The dog stays on a shelf and watches you fold laundry. I am not giving mine back.

Anything in the photos that is not on the shopping list above is a styling extra, so use what you already own.